Global times Facebook page:
Over 9 million Chinese high school seniors take the most important test of their lives on June 7. Experience all the pain and glory by taking a crack at our Gaokao Mini-Essay Contest during June 7 to June 16 on Sina Weibo and Facebook. There’s no character limit, so go nuts. Post as much as it takes for you to get your point across in our Facebook page, and cross your fingers. Winners will be announced on June 20, keep checking our Facebook page and Weibo account for updates!
And if you know anything about Gaokao questions, it's that:
1. They are a literal equivalent of life or death for students and for animals (in one city, frogs from a nearby lake had to be put to death so they didn't disrupt Gaokao exams with the noise they made)
2. They have the most fucked up questions you'll ever encounter in the course of your academic life or just, life in general.
3. It's so competitive that diligent students get hooked up to IV drips in the classroom
Beijing Cream recently posted a hilarious parody piece about the sort of questions the Gaokao churns out to those poor mainland students every year and here is an example:
“If Edison was able to visit the 21st century” is a short stone’s throw away from, “If Jesus were alive today,” or, “If dinosaurs landed in San Diego…”
WHAT WOULD YOU DO?
Old McDonald’s farm was glorious and prosperous, except for foreign agents who hated cell phones. Explain your high school existence, keeping in mind Isaac Newton loves apples.
In conclusion, WHAT WOULD YOU DO if donkeys could mate with the skeletons of pigs?
And check out this explosive diarrhea of a question:
Sorry. I had to.